Bucksketball Podcast

The Milwaukee Bucks’ Sinister Six (and friends)

| January 15, 2013

Category: Ridiculous Things

Last night, the nickname “Dr. Blocktopus” was created by Eric Buenning and me for Larry Sanders. Sanders dug the nickname and Eric and I began to collaborate on the Milwaukee Bucks’ version of the Sinister Six from Spider Man.

Eric wrote the words and I made the images. We didn’t want to stop after six players, so we turned the entire roster into Spider Man villains. Hopefully Stan Lee doesn’t sue us. Please enjoy.

The Sinister Six

Larry “Doctor Blocktopus” Sanders

Blessed with what at times seems like mutliple appendeges, Dr. Blocktopus uses his high-level intelligence and creative genius to frustrate offenses.  He is considered to be one of the most persistent and dangerous foes for opponents each night.
Abilities:
–Super strong and durable mechanical (tattooed) appendages
–Telepathic control over mechanical appendages and opposing offenses.

 

Brandon “Mysterio” Jennings

A man of many alter-egos, Mysterio always appeared to have a flair for the dramatic.  With a chip always on his shoulder, Mysterio Jennings (being a special effects expert) puts on a show on the court (some calling it his ‘swag’).
Abilities:
–Special Effects Expert
–Master of Illusion (you may think he’s out of a game, but then he’ll explode and drop 20 in a quarter)

 

Monta “Electro” Ellis

While playing a meaningless game of ’21′ back in elementary school, “Electro” was struck by lightning and tragically left unconscious.  When he came to, “Electro”  Ellis found that he had the ability to make offensive moves that others couldn’t even fathom.  His new found energy and unpredictability on the offensive end of the court was, dare I say, electric.
Abilities:
–Flight (through the lane)
–Electric (Offensive) manipulation

 

Ersan “Sandman” Ilyasova aka “Ersandman”

Filled with completely organic sand (no word on whether it’s Turkish sand), Ersandman uses his super-human endurance and ability to shapeshift to work around defenders and grab offensive rebounds when everyone isn’t expecting him to do so.  Unfortunately, he sometimes doesn’t completely harness his abilities and morphs into sand, which is a real hassle for the staff when they are then required to sweep him off the court.
Abilities:
–Super human strength, endurance, and rebounding prowess
–Density Control (which explains how he can grab boards without jumping)
–Vulnerability to water

 

Mike “Kraven the Hunter” Dunleavy

A big game hunter that doesn’t like to use guns or arrows, M”KTH”D prefers to destroy enemies with his bare hands (generally in the form of “daggers,” also known as three-pointers).  He is respected around the league for “killing his game” fairly, by taking shots within the offense and not going off on random heat checks.
Abilities:
–Expert hunter
–Longevity
–Superhuman senses

 

John “Vulture” Henson

Armed with enormous “wings” that some have suggested give him the ability to fly (no word on whether Henson has tried), “Vulture” uses his superhuman attributes to cause havoc on the glass.  Given that he hasn’t filled out just yet, his wings are still sharp and are considered weapons to anyone daring enough to them.

Abilities:

–Heightened physical attributes

–Wings/Weapons
Friends
Luc Richard Mbah a Hobgoblin
Beno “Rhino” Udrih
Ekpe “Green Goblin” Udoh
Marquis “Lizard” Daniels
Tobias “Shocker” Harris
Samuel “Venom” Dalembert
Drew “Chameleon” Gooden
Joel “Speed Demon” Pryzbilla
Jim “Spiderman” Boylan
Full Roster

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About the Author ()

Jon Hartzell is a Bucks fan trying to be more optimistic. Larry Sanders is wonderful. During the Fear the Deer run he was a ball boy for the team and was constantly yelled at by Kelvin Sampson. He’s currently a student at UW-Madison and writes for DIME Magazine and A.V. Club Milwaukee.

Comments (12)

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  1. Anil says:
    January 15, 2013 at 6:25 pm

    That Drew Gooden pic really made my day. It fits so well.

  2. Jose says:
    January 15, 2013 at 7:14 pm

    I agree that the ideal situation would be for Tobias (Henson too?)blossom into a star, along side a very good Larry and Jennings. I like, and would keep the current roster, aside from Prysbilla, Daniels, Dalembert, and Ellis.

  3. Patti says:
    January 16, 2013 at 8:21 am

    Hilarious! Nailed it. Great job guys…thanks for the laughs this morning.

  4. Sillybilly says:
    January 16, 2013 at 10:53 am

    Luc Richard Mbah a Hobgoblin LOL

  5. Nick Montoya says:
    January 16, 2013 at 4:08 pm

    Heeeey, i had this same idea on twitter jan 11th ! when are you guys going to open up the blog for a new writer by the way? ….love what you guys are doing so far

    copy & past from twitter:

    Nick Montoya ‏@NM3706
    @fswisconsin #blockparty Larry SandMan Sanders (like spidey villian&song mr sandman) shape shifts stretches his body to put shots to sleep
    Collapse Reply Delete Favorite More
    1
    FAVORITE
    8:26 PM – 11 Jan 13 · Details
    Tweet text
    Reply to @NM3706 @fswisconsin

    • Patti says:
      January 16, 2013 at 4:58 pm

      Nick, have you gone to the forum? Link is on top of web page. You can open topic and express your opinions/ ideas there. That would seem to me to be a good place to get exposure for your writing. Give that a try…you never know!

  6. Andyroo says:
    January 22, 2013 at 11:19 am

    This. is. awesome.

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